Monday, November 9, 2015

The "War" on Christmas?

I love Christmas.  It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside when I see the Christmas lights and displays go up.  I would have no problem if we celebrated Christmas 365 days out of the year.  Keep your elaborate inflatable displays up year round.  And, guess what? I'm a JEW!!  Just to prove my love for Christmas here is a picture of me and my sister with the real Santa Claus:

Santa looked annoyed, but boy I couldn't have been happier!  

It usually takes something extremely controversial to motivate me to actually sit down and write a blog. Like the supposed war on Christmas that some guy, Joshua Feuerstein, from Arizona currently claims that Starbucks is waging because they are using plain red cups this holiday season.  As one of the few Jews growing up in Tucson, Arizona back in the '70's and '80's I was besieged with Christmas marketing.  Even today, I feel extra special when I walk into Target and see that one Chanukah row hiding behind the candy aisle.  That one row with about 1/20th of the holiday items the Christmas display has.  But, do I complain?  Nope.  I'm totally content with my own tiny Chanukah space.

Growing up I recall watching "Frosty the Snowman", "Rudolph the Rednose Reindeer", "A Charlie Brown Christmas", "Twas the Night Before Christmas" and other films year-after-year.  Not much going on with Chanukah.  Thanks to Adam Sandler, the Jews actually got a Chanukah song played on the radio in the '90's so everyone could goof on us.  Hey, but us Jews...we have a sense of humor so we're totally cool with it.  Of course, Sandler had to ruin all the fun with a crappy movie about Chanukah.  Again, we didn't really complain.

Today I put on SiriusXM radio and guess what? On November 9th they already have not one but TWO holiday stations playing ("Holly" and "Holiday Traditions") and pretty much most all of the music is Christmas oriented. When I drove to the mall near my office today I saw this hanging from the light:

So, Mr. Feuerstein and anyone else that believes there is a war on Christmas:  Stop your fussing, find a more important cause to get behind and remember that you are fortunate to have Christmas and your rows and rows of Christmas stuff at Target and other stores. You are not being persecuted because Starbucks didn't put snowflakes or pine trees on their red cups.  If anything, I should be pissed off that you, Mr. Feuerstein, has somehow appropriated a name that sounds Jewish and we'll probably wind up getting blamed for this dopey controversy.  

That stated, if you see a blue Starbucks holiday cup with a dreidel on it then you can start bitching.  Until then, pipe down!

Monday, January 12, 2015

SuperJew Finds the Best Ice in Southern Arizona

In Arizona, ice (frozen H2O) is of critical importance.  When the temperature reaches 100+ we all need a little ice to cool off.  I enjoy ice in all forms: cubed, crushed, melted, cracked, shaved, block, glacial, and even ice balls.  I have studied ice extensively and even learned via Wikipedia that Lloyd Groff Copeman invented the flexible rubber ice cube tray.  That said, I consider myself an expert on consumable ice.  I love chewing on a cube of ice and cooling off my warm, dry mouth.  I have chewed ice all over Southern Arizona and on Saturday night I finally concluded that I found the crème de la crème of frozen water cubes in the greater Tucson, Arizona area.  It was at Vero Amore Dove Mountain.

I was enjoying Meatballs Marinara with Linguini.  After a few bites I felt the urge to take a drink of my water and then magic occurred.  I took a chomp out of the ice cube and it immediately cracked down into a form of shaved ice on my molars.  It was a thing of beauty.  An icicle in cubical form.  At that moment I realized I had found the holy grail of ice in Tucson.

Here is a pic of the ice:

Note the clarity of the cubes...this means that it's really good.  

I am smitten with the ice at Vero Amore.  I propose that the restaurants in Tucson and surrounding areas have a yearly ice competition.

Saturday, January 10, 2015

SuperJew's Report Card of Eegee's Red Licorice Flavor

Shalom! It's been several months since I have written a blog but I finally found something near and dear to my heart to write about: Eegee's Flavor of the Month for January.

A week back I decided to check on the Flavors of the Month for 2015 and was devastated to see that my favorite all-time flavor (Cherry Pineapple) did not make the cut.  My despair was quickly replaced with elation when I noticed that January's flavor was Red Licorice!  I have spent decades consuming copious amounts of licorice.  Red Vines, Twizzlers, Twizzler Bites, generic licorice from gas stations, you name it.  If it's red and it's licorice I'll consume it.  Unlike Magic Johnson, I don't care if my Red Vines are soft.  They can be hard as a rock and I'll figure out a way to ingest them.

One time I even threw a temper tantrum at the Flamingo Hilton casino over Twizzlers.  I sat down at a 3-card poker table eating my beloved licorice and the dealer tells me "you are not permitted to eat at the table."  I angrily responded, "oh, so you're saying I can drink here and maybe spill my drink or I can smoke here and get ashes all over the table, but I can't eat my licorice?"  Almost got booted from the casino that day...

So, last night I figured I would take the plunge and taste the Red Licorice Eegee.  I had already read numerous online reviews of the flavor and they were mixed.  Here are my findings:

Eegee's Red Licorice Grade: D

The flavor is meh.  It doesn't have enough of the licorice flavoring that I would have wanted.  They do provide you with a piece of red licorice which you can break up and mix in with the drink.  That does add some flavor, but eat it quickly because the licorice will harden and possibly cause you to choke.

Eegee's Red Licorice Grade (with Red Vine chunks): B

This enhances the flavor and makes you much happier.  Trust me.

Eegee's Red Licorice Grade (with Red Vine chunks and Vodka): A+

It is the perfect combination for any occasion (especially when you are alone reading a romance novel). 

Monday, February 24, 2014

Episode 1: SuperJew and Rebecca Visit Governor Brewer's Office

With the incompetent Arizona legislature passing SB 1062 and HB 2153, SuperJew and Rebecca decided to pay a visit to Arizona Governor Jan Brewer's office asking that she veto these bills.  The escapade begins outside of the Arizona state building in Tucson at 400 West Congress.

SuperJew waits patiently in a bed of purple flowers for his trusty sidekick, Rebecca, to arrive.  Random cars honk at SuperJew as if they have never seen a man in a cape on Congress before.  Most people try to avoid eye contact.

Rebecca arrives at 12:03.  It is now time to infiltrate the state building and pay a visit to Governor Brewer on the 4th floor.

SuperJew will deliver this important message to the Governor's office, along with a plate of tasty Homotaschen.

The Homotaschen

SuperJew and Rebecca ventured into the state building and made it to   the 4th floor where Governor Brewer's office is located.  A woman commented to her friend after seeing SuperJew, "you see, we really need better security in this building."
Disappointment as Governor Brewer's office was closed and posted on the door was this message.  

Rebecca called the 800 number but all circuits were busy. SuperJew was sad.

All this hard work trying to save Arizona made SuperJew and Rebecca hungry.  Dejected, they went to lunch.  But it wasn't going to be a sad ending to our adventure. Look who they found at the dining establishment: Tucson Mayor Jonathan Rothschild!  He read the letter to Governor Brewer.

He read and he read.  SuperJew proudly smiled.

While Governor Brewer won't be able to enjoy the delectable Homotaschen, the Tucson mayor did!  

While it was a blast to see Mayor Rothschild, our mission is not accomplished.  Please contact Governor Brewer today and ask her to veto SB 1062 at (602) 542-4331!

Also, sign a petition:


Our adventures will continue...

P.S., here is the world's most SuperJewiest sidekick Rebecca:

Rebecca and Molly!

Follow SuperJew @MoGoldman on Twitter.